Where it all begins.....

I come in from PT at Fort Campbell and my phone rings. Its my mom telling me to turn on the News. So I do and just then I saw a plane fly into the World Trade Center. HOLY SHIT! She tells me about the plane that hit just before and we talk for a few minutes then I say I gotta go. I knew what this meant. I grabbed my ruck and my lbe and hauled ass to the airfield. Didn't even shower that day. At Fort Campbell, we reacted fast even if it meant not going anywhere. The whole hangar was quiet and all you heard from the offices were radios playing news broadcasts of the beginning of a very scary journey.

At this time, I had a small circle of friends, DJ being one of my best friends. He was a young Soldier, brand new to the unit. He had his struggles, just as I had when I was a young dumb private lol. Late for work, alarm clock not really a very useful tool lol. So, my best friend Jenny and I took him under our wings and set him straight. By the time I PCS'd to Fort Hood, DJ was in a flight company and considered one of their better crewchiefs. A far cry from the young DJ we first met.

So, in August 2002 I psc'd to Fort Hood and was assigned to a section that I grew to love yet hate...if that makes sense. Remember how I mentioned NCO's who sat behind a desk and directed work from there? I had one of those guys, and what really fueled my fire was the fact that he and I were in AIT together. He should have known more than he portrayed. But the junior enlisted folks in the section became some of my closest friends. Especially once we deployed for the first time together in March 2003. During the initial push, we convoyed north to Tikrit. Not really encountering much more than a farmer killing his sheep and a chaplain getting tackled by his assistant---I'll save this story for later. In other words, the convoy north, we were truly blessed. TRULY.

I will never forget when my old unit from Fort Campbell came to support our mission in Tikrit. It was so nice to see old, familiar faces. I spent alot of time hanging out with the old crewdogs, even had choice words with one of the pilots for doing shady stuff lol. Long story short; he stripped a component of parts and turned the shell in....had to go back to him and say "Sir, come on now, I know I taught you better than that lol" Yet another story for another day.

It was early November and we were preparing for a mission. One of our aircraft that was scheduled to fly ended up broke so we had to call on my old unit to pick up that spot in the flight. I will never forget that day so long as I live. Even though I had no control over the aircraft breaking, I still hold onto a guilt......they were out on the mission and getting ready to head back. The aircraft that replaced ours was hit by an RPG and went down in the river. CW3 Kyran E. Kennedy, CPT Benedict J. Smith, SGT Scott C. Rose, SSG Paul M. Neff II lost their lives that day,November 7th 2003. Scott never got the chance to see his baby girl. I know I had no control over this but I still harbored the guilt because I could see the pain in all my friends faces. I could hear the anger and the hurt, and I could see the blame being placed on us. My unit didn't want me to go over there and be with my old unit. They wanted to "give them their space" I told them flat out, their my unit, I need MY space..and right now its with them.

Eventually word spread to the Brigade Commander that I was close to all these guys. So he allowed me to go up to Mosul for the Memorial. While I was there, I attempted to locate DJ but unfortunately, he was out on a mission. I never did get to see him. He died along with 16 other people in a midair collision over Mosul on November 15th 2003. I have so much regret here because I never did get a chance to see him and give him one last hug. And you know, I never really understood why Stars and Stripes felt the need to publish the photo of them hoisting the remains of his helicopter off the top of the building.......that's the last memory I have of DJ. His destroyed helicopter being removed from the rooftops of Mosul. DJ was truly a brother to me, I loved him with all my heart and soul and to this day I cannot let go of the fact that I never got to say goodbye....even though I didn't know I needed to.....I wanted so badly to see him that day. Something told me to try to find him. Yet I never was able.

Everyone is haunted by their own scars of war. These two are the ones that eat at me the most. So I figured, their the ones I should start this whole thing off with. Thanks for reading....more to follow.

RIP:
CW2 Scott A. Saboe [P]
2LT Jeremy L. Wolfe [P]
SPC Jeremiah J. DiGiovanni [CE] "DJ"
SPC Ryan T. Baker [C]
SPC William D. Dusenbery [C]
SGT John W. Russell
WO1 Erik C. Kesterson [P]
SGT Warren S. Hansen [C]
CPT Pierre E. Piche
SGT Michael D. Acklin II
SFC Kelly Bolor
PFC Sheldon R. Hawk Eagle
PFC Richard W. Hafer
PFC Damian L. Heidelberg
SPC John R. Sullivan
SPC Eugene A. Uhl III
PFC Joey D. Whitener

And all of our fallen comrades......they live within us.